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The Narcissist in Your Life Podcast is hosted by Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D., clinical expert on the narcissistic personality, psychotherapist and author. I offer in-depth analysis, strategies and practices for those psychologically and emotionally harmed and abused by toxic, predatory narcissistic personalities through my books: Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist and Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life, international telephone consultations and global podcasts. I put the emphasis on helping individuals to access the calming, restorative parts of the parasympathetic body/mind systems that lead to healing, recovery, personal transformation and the evolution of your true, authentic self and your unique creative gifts.

Jan 18, 2023

"In narcissistic personaities the experience of emptiness is most intense and almost constant..." (Otto Kernberg, M.D., clinical expert on the narcissistic personality). 

"The narcissist's experience of emotional emptiness is beyond sadness. It is a severe and intractable wounding,..., a pain...savage and deep. The psychological (inner) landscape of the narcissist is bleak. (Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life, Linda Martinez-Lew, Ph.D., LMFT). 

As a result the high level narcissist is a very restless human being, always surveying his/her external environment for narcissistic supplies: adulation, praise, self-indulgence, the company of highly attractive men and women, sexual escapes, the pursuit of material indulgence, the company of highly attractive men and women, seeking raw power to control others, manipulation of those whom they experience as competitors. 

"The successful narcissist creates an intricate system of positive feedback in the form of friends, associates, partners, spouses---who perpetually fufill his endless needs." (From Freeing Yourself From the Narcissist in Your LIfe). The narcissist is incapable of having a real relationship with another person. He/she doesn't have a relationship with himself/herself. Everything in his/her life is externalized and the most prized possession of all is the elaborate golden image that he/she creates and perpetuates all of his life.

Deep inside the narcissist experiences himself/herself as psychologically empty. These powerful feelings are unconscious to him.her. At the core the narcissist is full of self loathing, living as a false self, unable to be real, to reciprocate feelings of affection or love. Emotionally he/she is shallow and incaapable of creating or sustaining any authentic human relationships. 

Narcissistic emptiness in many ways drives the high level narcissist's obsessive greed. 

High level narcissists are extraordinarily greedy. Greed is an extreme desire and pursuit to obtain more than what one needs, especially material largesse. They are never satisfied with what they have and are very competitive with other narcissists. 

They always must be at the very pinnacle, the top of the mountain, the guy or girl who takes home all of the marbles (even if he/she steals them from others.) In our current narcissistic society, voracious greed has become acceptable to many people. 

High level narcissists surround themselves with a charmed circle of people who provide him/her with unending narcissistic supplies: praise, adoration, continuous kudos, even worship. These individuals are obsessively loyal to the narcissist as long as they can fuse with his/her grandiosity, extreme self entitlement and delusional world. 

When you learn and understand the dynamics of the high level narcissistic personality, you have gained knowledge, insight and power. Now you understand what makes these individuals function, why they react with such venom and their feverish search for narcissistic supplies to fill up the bottomless pit of their psychological emptiness. 

Learn how to emotionally detach from the high level narcissist and maintain your psychological boundaries. You are entitled to respect and being treated as a separate human being who has intrinsic value, integrity, dignity and wisdom. 

Practice self care each day: rest and sleep that you need and deserve, revitalizing experiences with Nature, meditation as you understand this, movement and exercise that works for you, using your unique creative gifts. 

Click the link below for my book: Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist on Amazon:

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