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The Narcissist in Your Life Podcast is hosted by Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D., clinical expert on the narcissistic personality, psychotherapist and author. I offer in-depth analysis, strategies and practices for those psychologically and emotionally harmed and abused by toxic, predatory narcissistic personalities through my books: Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist and Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life, international telephone consultations and global podcasts. I put the emphasis on helping individuals to access the calming, restorative parts of the parasympathetic body/mind systems that lead to healing, recovery, personal transformation and the evolution of your true, authentic self and your unique creative gifts.

Jul 8, 2019

This psychological defense is characterized by the perception that everything is black and white; there is no grey, no nuancing of reality. You notice that the narcissist perceives other people as all good or all bad. It is either thumbs up or thumbs down with them. This demonstrate that the narcissist is psychologically arrested around the age of two or before. A child who grows normally leaves this extreme stage of always saying no and insisting that he is always right and everyone else is wrong or that it is all good or bad, friend or enemy - there is no in-between, no modulation and therefore no deep understanding of himself or others. 

Narcissists maintain this splitting defense as a way of protecting their false grandiose selves. Splitting plays an essential role in insulating the narcissist from the truth about himself. By separating the grandiose inflated false self from the damaged, empty, real self. 

Here are examples of the narcissist's regressed psyche: 

I am smart; you are stupid. I am strong; you re weak.

I am attractive; you are unattractive, even ugly.

You cannot have an authentic relationship with an individual who is psychologically a two year old or younger. Narcissistic personality is fixed and not inclined to change. Without a conscience and feeling superior the narcissist experiences himself at the center of the universe. What king or queen gives up the crown and adoration. 

You are authentic, every evolving. Time to move forward along your own pathway of creativity, restoration and transformation. 

 

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