Sep 6, 2020
Quoting from my book: Freeing Yourself From the Narcissist in Your Life:
"The future partner of the high level narcissist was often the child of an arrogant, demanding narcissistic parent. From his/her earliest days he was conditioned to respond to his parent's arbitrary rules and whims. The narcissistic mother or father conducted himself as a dictator, without a conscience immune to any outside authority. From the time they are very little, these children become experts at catering to the idiosyncratic needs of the narcissistic parent....Those who cast themselves in shadow are psychologically hungry..."
The high level narcissist presents himself with irresistible charm and high confidence. He reads people very well with distinct cunning. He knows exactly what you yearn to have and communicates that he or she is the source of the fulfillment your deepest wishes. Narcissists are particularly attracted to sensitive, kind, compassionate individuals whom they can control,, dominate and who give them endless chances. This partner smooths out the rough edges of the high level narcissist and burnishes his image.
Partnering with a high level narcissist leads for many to a life in the shadows.
High levels don't share center stage. They expect you to be out in the audience, their super fans, keeping their egos fully inflated like billowing sails on a fine windy day.
Partnering with a high level you are the servant to the lord or lady of the manor. You are expected to obey and follow the rules to the letter. You must cater to the needs and whims of the partner at all times.
For all of your efforts, hard work and loyalty you are treated with constant criticism, humiliations, accusations and coldness. You recognize that you were never appreciated for yourself as an individual.
After many years and decades under the thumb of the high level tyrant you decide after keen observation and your research that you must separate from this abusive non-relationship.
This time you take the reins in your capable hands and move forward as a strong, grounded resilient individual. You can feel your confidence building, your sense of self gaining momentum along your own pathway of transformation and evolution.