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The Narcissist in Your Life Podcast is hosted by Linda Martinez-Lewi, Ph.D., clinical expert on the narcissistic personality, psychotherapist and author. I offer in-depth analysis, strategies and practices for those psychologically and emotionally harmed and abused by toxic, predatory narcissistic personalities through my books: Recovering and Healing After the Narcissist and Freeing Yourself from the Narcissist in Your Life, international telephone consultations and global podcasts. I put the emphasis on helping individuals to access the calming, restorative parts of the parasympathetic body/mind systems that lead to healing, recovery, personal transformation and the evolution of your true, authentic self and your unique creative gifts.

Sep 7, 2019

Psychological fusion is a compulsive need to be with a particular person.

This is used unconsciously to resolve deep pain and longing inside of the dependent partner/spouse.

You feel incomplete without this fusion which can contain psycho-sexual chemistry that is reinforced with intimacy.

The dependent party is at the mercy of the narcissistic partner who exploits, abuses, demands, manipulates the partner. There are outrageous acting out behaviors with ugly primitive projections, silent treatment, threats of abandonment, humiliations.

You have discovered recently that this individual is a narcissistic personality who lies, deceives, manipulates and exploits you.

You are caught up in the highs and lows of the partner's pathological drama.

Causes of your dependency and psychological fusion:

Past childhood trauma, maternal deprivation, abandonment issues, not developing the psychological capacity to be alone.

Each time you return to the partner, you reinforce the pathologivcal fusion. This is intermittent positive reinforcement.

For some individuals there is an awakening. You no longer aer controlled by the narcissistic partner. You are the author of your days.

Practice daily calming, restorative routines: sleep, rest, nourishment, movement/exercise, solitude, quiet.

Unedited writing, time in Nature, drawing, sketching, photography. 

You are moving forward as an independent individual: free, steady, creative, solid, strong.

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